are really stinking hot here in Va. BUT, I love them anyways. The past week it's been about 100 with 99% humidity :) got to love it. Charly has been at girls camp..poor girl but she is having a blast despite the heat.
Lots to catch up on it seems, near the end of the school year my life gets pretty crazy. With volunteering for every ones classroom activities, field day, setting up Isaac's 504 plan, Charly having pink eye for 3 weeks, Michael working really, REALLY long hours at the fair,girls camp prep., Michael leaving for scout camp for 6days, catering a few graduation parties, tiling the neighbors bathroom,and life in general.. (breathe) I feel like I'm treading water just trying to keep my head up so I don't drown. Hopefully that is a good one as far as excuses go, for not keeping up with my blog.
So the last time I was able to post I was thinking about going back to school. I've wanted to for a long time but when being a wife and mother comes first (and it should always come first), timing has got to be key. I've found the right time, it took a lot of searching and praying to find the right school with the right program. I found it though :)
I was absolutely sure I want to go back and continue nursing. That was a no brainer. A few months ago when I was really agonizing over this decision, I asked my cute husband to give me a blessing. He did, but I guess I was waiting and expecting to get a play by play revelation or something saying this is what you do..and then you do this..and blah blah... and it didn't happen...at all. It was a rather short blessing. My only direction was to not read but study my scriptures and there I would find my answer. At the time I was thinking that I had just gotten some pretty generic advice from a husband who clearly didn't want his wife to go back to school. What a PUNK I am! I sat there when he was finished like...that's it, that's all you've got? I decided to have a little faith and trust that my husband (who really is the best person in the world) had just given me a message from my Heavenly Father. So I began to read and study more. Typically I would just open my scriptures before bed and pick a few verses and call it good. Unless I was preparing a lesson which clearly requires more than that :). Something interesting happened though. I had a pretty remarkable shift in my ideals. Not because I had had a revelation or had read something that made me change my mind. It just kind of happened. I just decided to go in a different direction and things have been much easier since that decision.
I decided to pursue Respiratory therapy. It takes the same amount of time as a nursing degree but it is different in a lot of ways. I've known many r.t's at the hospital but I had never even thought about doing it..that's how committed I was to my decision to be a nurse.
I had to do a lot of studying since it's been almost 15 years since I graduated. I did take classes at nova, and I completed a vocational program for med./surg. assisting but those classes are not transferable...so that meant that because my math and English had not been completed within the past 5 years I had to start back a square one and take placement testing and the whole crappy deal. I cannot express how much anxiety I've had over this. I stink at math! I was going to have to take remedial math with a bunch of kids and here I am almost 32 years old. I'm at a disadvantage.. I almost changed my mind BUT for me that's almost impossible to do. ..(it's a genetic flaw) so, I set a date to go and take my tests..4 1/2 hours of testing...uuhhhhgggg! I sat in my car for a while. Before I left home, I had a really good experience praying, I had a great feeling and I knew that it would be ok, I had resigned myself to the fact that if I do need to sit in a class full of 18 year olds and re-take Algebra I, then that's what I would do to make my dream a reality. Again sitting in my car, I couldn't resist the temptation to pray..same thing happened. I would be ok. In my effort to stall just a little more I picked up Michael's Book of Mormon and began to read a little. The verse I opened to was "I am the Alpha and the Omega..." How fitting..to me that meant "Carrie, I said it's going to be fine, why don't you just have a little more faith, and get out of the car!..NOW!" So I made the long walk into the college. Not knowing anyone or where I was going. Eventually I found my way, walking by people who are so SO SO much younger and more eager to be there. I completed all of my testing and the math was brutal. I wasn't for sure how many sections there were and at section 7 I got up and asked the lady watching me from her desk, what to do. I was finished. I didn't know the answers ..so pretty much "do you stop the test now, or do I start guessing?" She said to guess.. Luckily there were only 8 sections to the math test.
I did make a few guesses but tried to work out every problem...some taking up a few pages. Others I just tried to make an educated guess because I'd never seen anything like it before but I have had one of the most amazing math teachers and he taught me to do what I do know and get to that point and re-evaluate the problem. Anyhow (this is much longer that I thought it would be...sorry) So I finished up, took the English and reading test and a few other things. The lady behind the desk handed me a paper and said to take it to my advisor. So I went to find my advisor who by the way was maybe 20...YUP! He said, wow! you've been out of school 14 years, and you're almost 32, you have 5 F.I.V.E. kids, and... you must be crazy.. then he asked if I had been studying, and what my highest math had been. (Algebra II passed with a D) Needless to say, he was shocked because I had just tested out of every Math class they offer. I only needed to pass the first 3 sections but I had passed all 8. I had tested out of Calculus with analytical geometry II...and more, but that one just sounds hard :) I was shocked, and completely humbled because of what my heavenly father had done for me. I hate math, I am not afflicted with false modesty (just like E.Bennett) , I really suck at it. This was nothing short of a miracle. And while some would say it's dumb luck, or you're smarter that you thought..maybe even a tiny miracle, to me it was huge.
A few friends think I may in fact be crazy for trying to go back. Maybe I'll fail miserably, I don't know..but I'm going to try. The fact is that Michael has a great job and supports our family and pays our bills. But his check only stretches that far. I've been cleaning a house twice a month for an older lady down the street. So I feed our family of 7 and buy whatever else we need on $200 a month. That's almost impossible. With the cost of food increasing and our children getting bigger,eating more, and out-growing everything.. that's just not possible anymore. Michael is a good sport and works overtime when he can BUT he is burnt out and loves to be home with the kids too. So why not fulfill a dream that I've had and help my family in the process? I certainly won't get rich from this and I have no intentions of working full time but it will help.. What's even better is that one of us will be able to be home with the kids everyday. We'll still have lots of time being all together too. I've learned that every one's situations are different. Some women never have to work, some don't want to, some work full time, some part time, some HAVE to and some WANT to.. Which ever category I fall into, I'm excited for the opportunity!